Another Move

I have been completely MIA from social media, save for a few glances here and there.

But, it’s because I moved again! And that makes 8 moves in the last 7.5 years. A bulk of those have been within the last few years (I will get more into the why of that at a later time), but moves aren’t easy.

Yes, I may say I am a pro at moving now, but the packing and moving of your things is the easy part…it’s the unpacking of your emotions that take some time. A major transition will bring about many feelings, and those fragile things need to be handled with care 🙂

And I’ll admit those feelings are a bit amplified in the 10 or so days before my cycle. But hey, I am grateful for the times those feelings spring up lol. They have to arise for us to work through them right?

I am so happy a few months back I came across Rachael Lynn’s page on Instagram. I was on my quest to find more female authors (aka rockstars 🙂 ) and saw that Rachael wrote “At Home Anywhere: Feel at home wherever life takes you.”

And I truly believe that in life there are no coincidences, and that everything happens for a reason. So when I saw this book, I knew it would be incredibly helpful as I made my next move, and that it did! 

In this book, Rachael tells of her move to Dubai just a week after she got married. Though her background in the personal development world, as an advisor to life coaches, supplied her with an abundance of self-help tools, it didn’t exonerate her from the feelings of depression when she moved abroad.

Yes, everyone is susceptible to feelings of depression. And a big life change such as a move will bring up unresolved feelings, you may have “packed away” at the back of your mind. And not only are you dealing with that, but you’re doing so in an entirely new home, new neighborhood, new everything. It can be pretty overwhelming.

Rachael’s story of making sense of her self after her move, and using the tools she has learned over her life was so helpful to me.

One thing that stood out to me was in one of the “Write it out” prompts at the end of every chapter. 

It said “If you left your new home next week, what would you regret not spending more time doing while you were there?”

In each of my homes, I hate to admit it, but I complained a lot. Whether if it was the lack of privacy or having to get the place spick and span for a showing because it was still on the market…but when I found myself gearing up for another move it was bittersweet, because I reminisced on all the good times, and was thinking on all the things I wish I had done.

“Why didn’t I paddle board more often?”

“Why didn’t I walk down to Kellogg beach with the kids more?”

Or 

“Why did I stay home on some evenings when I could’ve been watching the sunset on the beach? I lived right there! Why wasn’t I soaking up every second at the beach!”

When faced with a move, or when already settled in to your new home, you remember all the good times of the place before. And I did not want to have that feeling of regret in my new home here. So when I saw this eloquent and perfectly worded prompt, it really gave me a great outlook and mindset going into my new place.

Prior to the move, I had to deal with an almost hour long commute to get to my kid’s school. But now with the commute being eliminated, there was a question if my mornings will now be stress-free?

But because Rachael addressed recognizing expectations in the book, I felt prepared in my mind knowing my mornings still may be a bit rushed and stressful despite not having that commute. And you know what? It helped me so much! Because those first few days in our new home, we were late to school! Despite being a 10 minute walk away, we were still late! Lol

So instead of being all disgruntled and thinking this house is a sham because it didn’t live up to the hype of ease and being convenient, it didn’t bother me, because I recognized my expectations prior.

In the last week, two of my new friends from my new community told me their parent just passed away. I think it sparked the nightmare I woke up from last night, that my father was also going to pass. That dream made me feel a rush of emotions.

“Did I make the right move?”

“I was in such close proximity to my friends and family at my old home.”

“Will I regret not being closer to them if something happens?”

And these feelings are all valid and occur frequently to people who make a move. Rachael addresses this as one of the hardest things about moving, and that if you’re feeling this way it is probably a sign to reach out. Connecting with people is such an integral part our being, so instead of turning inward when these feelings occurs, turn outward, and reach out to friends and family. The rejuvenation that occurs when this happen will really eliminate any feelings of loneliness.

And I really loved the part that says “you are impacting history because you are influencing the thought processes of the people who care about you…through your one ‘little decision.’”

In my Chaldean community, it is practically unheard of to move away from family, and move away from the tight-knit town we all grew up in. But perhaps all my moves will inspire someone else to move around, and show them it is ok to call somewhere else your home.

The most important thing with a move is to give yourself time and be gentle with yourself. It takes a lot to get acquainted with a new place. And this book really helped me. When reading, it felt like Rachael was my best friend holding my hand throughout this process.

I always say that our journey in life won’t be alone. There will be gentle nudges from people along our path that will help us make sense of our world. And at this stage of my life, Rachael’s book was exactly what I needed, and I am truly thankful that she showcased her authentic self in “At Home Anywhere.”

And reading this reiterated that every single one of us has a story to tell. How will you show us? How will we see your beautiful and authentic self? How will we get an unfiltered view to your magnificent soul?

Will you write? Paint? Sing? Gather like-minded individuals wanting connection like Rachael?

Your life is the most incredible thing.

Every single moment, every single breath you take, every face you see, every person you encounter, every embrace you have, every kiss you give…it is meaningful because it’s YOURS. It is a part of your beautiful and your amazing life. 

Your ups and your downs, it’s all apart of God’s magnificent plan. Your move was not for nothing. The people you encounter are all meant to be, and showcasing your authentic self is exactly what the world needs.

Your life and making sense of this life is the greatest gift we can ever have.

And just like Rachael says “Remember that you are not alone…I am with you. And you’ve got this.”

-Vianca Joy

To read more about Rachael Lynn, or to buy “At Home Anywhere” check out https://www.rachael-lynn.com or follow her page on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/iam_rachaellynn/.