We hear those who are successful in life speak all about mindfulness and gratitude. Yogis, influencers, Ted Talk speakers, you name it.
Mindfulness and gratitude are touted as the key to success in life. So if those who are finding success sharing what they know, sharing their “secrets”, sharing what really worked, why are we not taking it to heart?
Yes we hear this message all the time, but are we listening? Are we actively trying to employ these tactics to succeed in life?
First of all do we even want to be successful? And I’m not just talking about monetary or financial success. I am talking about succeeding in every aspect of your life. Succeeding in being happy. Succeeding in crushing it every single day, no matter what your circumstances are.
Do you want to be the best mother that you can be? Do you want to be the best wife you can be? Do you want to be the best person that you can be?
We can all say we want to do better, but we stay complacent in our ways. Its easy maintain status quo. It’s risky to change what we become so familiar with.
Taking that leap to a better life doesn’t have to be scary. We can take it really slow, and in this fast paced life, practicing mindfulness and gratitude, will have you on the path to greatness, moment by moment.
What is mindfulness?
Mindfulness is actively being aware in the present moment.
There is no doubt that there are beautiful moments in everyday things but what happens when theres a not-so beautiful moment?
I was driving the other day and someone flipped me off (lol). In the past, this situation would have made me upset, my energy would have matched that of the bird-giver, and eventually my whole day could have been down in the dumps.
But each time that thought and that image of the person flipping me off came to mind, I just tossed it into my mental trash bucket.
I didn’t let it overtake me and I didn’t let it affect my state of mind. I was actively being present in my day to day life and I was not letting any negative thoughts seep through my mental shield and overpower me. And it’s no coincidence that same day I had such meaningful conversations with complete strangers who just started chatting with me.
The other day I was getting my nails done, and I wanted to fill my idle time with something meaningful and productive, so I turned to my phone and scrolled through to find a podcast. I came upon Love, Happiness, and Success, by Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby and I am so grateful that I did!
Lisa Marie Bobby, PhD, is a licensed marriage and family therapist, a board certified coach, and the founder and clinical director of Growing Self Counseling and Coaching. She also authored “Exaholics: Breaking Your Addiction to an Ex Love.”
What she said on this June 5 2017 episode was so profound and stuck with me, and I am so happy to share it with you all.
Everything that happens is fundamentally neutral until someone decides what it means and what they think about it, and only then, do they have an emotional reaction one way or the other, positive or negative.
What does that mean?
It means we have the power to cultivate happiness in our life.
We have the power to see good in EVERYTHING.
And the way we go about this is by practicing gratitude. This means paying attention to what we are thankful for.
When you wake up in the morning, are you thankful that you are alive and ready to take on the day? Are you thankful you can use your legs to come out of bed? That you even have a bed to sleep on? When you are about to sleep, do you really take note on how it feels for your head to rest on your pillow?
When you practice gratitude for every single thing in life, you will find that EVERYTHING is truly a blessing.
Dishes piling up? Wow I am so grateful that I have something to eat FOOD on. I am going to wash these to the best of my ability.
So much laundry to fold? I am so thankful I have so many people in my family and that we have clothes to wear. What an amazing treat it is to fold all this laundry.
Lacking motivation to go to the gym?
I can remember when I was visiting a friend in the hospital who was having complications due to surgery. She was frail, bed-bound, and a shell of her former happy and laughing self. She happened to have a physical therapy session while I was there and was struggling with all of her might to flex her leg and strengthen her quads.
In that moment I felt a shame wash over me. Here I was, taking the gym for granted, slugging through my workouts, and not realizing what a true gift I have.
But now, I am so grateful that I am able to workout and strengthen my mind and body. Now, I am completely present in my workouts and extremely thankful for every single movement my body can make.
I visited a winery earlier this year and for some reason when drinking at a winery your senses and description of your senses increase tenfold.
The color of the wine is much more vivid, the scent of the wine is much more aromatic, and the notes just hit all of your taste buds perfectly.
There is no reason why this mode of thinking cannot be applied to everyday life. It is such a gift to be alive. Take it all in!
Need help practicing gratitude? Keep a notebook by your bed, and in the evening write all the things that you are thankful for. The list will probably start out as more general (family, friends, job), but will transition to more specific (a passing butterfly, a blooming rose, the vivid shades of green in the trees around you). You will come to realize that EVERY SINGLE thing in life is a gift.
Being present in the moment will have you really taking in all the beauty of life. And practicing gratitude will have you appreciating this beauty you see. The more beauty you will see in life, the more you will appreciate the gift of life. And if you appreciate the gift of life, you will not let another day pass you, without being the best person that you can be.
Striving for success and showcasing your talents will be YOUR gift to the world. It is within you, and we are waiting for you to reveal it.
-Vianca Joy
To learn more about Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby and the ways she helps others grow into their best selves go to growingself.com
Vianca Joy 