Parenting

I had a bit of struggle taking my kids to camp yesterday.

My older son doesn’t have a problem at drop off, but my second son was crying and did not want to go.

It was hard to put his clothes on, it was hard to get him in the car to leave, and it was hard to take him out of the car for drop off.

There was a struggle all along the way. And being pressed for time, I had to entice him with games on my phone when he returned home. 😋

In the evening, unprompted, he told me

Sorry momma for being so upset today.

I was a little taken back by his emotional intelligence, but I just smiled and said don’t worry we all have those days.

Come to this morning, same story.

He was crying, he was upset, he didn’t want to go.

I asked him, “Hey what’s making you upset?”

NO

Why don’t you want to go?

NO

I saw him as sad and a little scared.

This was an all too familiar situation. Last school year we took a week off before his actual break, so he didn’t see his classmates for two weeks total. His group of friends were understandably more into each other and my son felt left out. In about two days he was back to his normal, fun, and happy self as his routine set in and his friends were reacquainted with him.

I asked him again, “Hey is someone making you upset?”

He looked at me and didn’t respond.

I knew we had the answer

Do you want to tell me who?

His “no” response was more softened than before.

Ok no problem, I said.

I came to him, kneeling down, my eyes level with his and I said

“I want you to play and have fun on your own. Don’t hang out with anyone you don’t want to or with someone who makes you upset. When people see how much fun you are having they are going to want to play with you.”

It was like a lightbulb going off in his cute 4 year old head. He said ok and briskly walked to the car and into his seat, off to camp with his dad and brother. No struggle and no difficulty like yesterday.

I don’t know what else today will bring, but that was a parenting win this morning.

Which brings me to my next point.

Do we really follow the advice we give our kids? Or are we blindly spouting them out?

Who are you surrounding yourself with?

People that uplift you? People who support you? People that want to see you thrive, succeed, and be the best person you can be?

It is hard to find awesome people like this, but it will be near impossible if you are sticking around toxic folks.

Examine your relationships.

Are they meaningful? Are they bringing you joy? Or are they bringing you down?

You will only find out if you take the time to get to know yourself. Maybe it’s in the time alone that you get the introspection you need.

You are amazing so start treating yourself that way.

-Vianca Joy

Update: He had a great day at camp 🙂